TILAPIA PURGATIVE

i

Wey Mensah dey prepare de soup noh

De pepper wey pass wanna nose self,

Like dat one kraa for warn us

But we naa, we be headtrong- we no biz.

Kofi sneeze; I cough

Mensah himself cough den sneeze!

Eno cher bia wey Mansah come.

Na she talk say ebe nice aroma wey dey de house

Wey she go take over- abi she be Mensah hin gerl dat.

Tilapia light soup.

I just make lucky say I carry my healf insurance card, valid.

 

ii

As she prepare de food finish,

Boy-boys make Alomo den tins

Wey we dey come chop.

Kofi see de soup norrh

Wey he talk say “blood tonic”.

De gerlie bore.

 

iii

As I taste am I feel songtin:

World first laxative wif salt den pepper.

Dat be what come my head, but I no talk;

Edey job like magic.

 

iv

But boys-boys, curtesy Alomo,

Chop everyting for de pot inside.

De girlie too make hin body fine,

So she sawk de soup all.

We finish perh, I go buy t-roll

I put am for ma car wey I lef.

My belly inside start boil den ron

But e no catch finish line, my luck!

Den e dey boil-boil for traffic inside.

 

v

Wey I reverse de car go catch   Mensah dema house-aa,

Kofi dey die; I join am:

We dey shank den dey come die.

Mensah plus Mensah  dey laf we: dem no dey feel notin.

Mansah  drive ma car carry we go clinic:

Two days.

Kofi no carry hin healf insurance card

Wey hin body dey come barb am; e lef small perh.

 

 

vi

Ebe Mensah wey know de secret-oo

Everybro wey sork Mansah soup for de first time biaaa

Your stomach mon ron;

Mensah dier, he be graduate for Mansah soups inside.

Hmmm.

 

 

vii

Today be two years wey we lef de clinic

Mansah come turn Mensah hin wife

I come visit dem for house

Mansah  san go dey kitchen

She dey make      fresh tilapia soup

Groundnut fresh tilapia soup made by Mansah.

Arjay.

 

viii

She dish de soup come

As I pop de bowl inside

De soup settle for layers inside

Ano talk nortin but Mensah spy my face dada

“Eno go do we nortin  cos dis no be first time”.

I know say Mensah fit convince me make I   chop;

I sabi am put down.

E be der norrrhh wey my phone bell:

Ebe Kofi…….

Written by 

Describing a man like this cannot be an easy task. A man of many parts and sides. A single statement of his sends confusion all over the place: some laugh it off; others weep. Highly unpredictable… consistently inconsistent. Strict but funny. You cannot fully know him because he does not know himself enough either. Settled? When you first meet him, he’s banal; then you get to know him a bit, then you like him. Get to know him some more and you don’t like him much anymore. Write him off…. A mistake. He likes to be undermined at first contact. WARNING! You’re in the territory of a man with uncommon experiences so don’t be unexpectant of the expected unexpected. What do I mean? DJ Merque’s hobbies are reading, teaching and video-making. Writing is his part-time job wae. Kweku Tuadzra started writing in 1996 and now has collections of plays, films, poems and stories. A product of Dzolo Secondary School. He read English, French and Theatre Arts for a first degree, graduating in 2000, having combined Theatre Arts and English. Subsequently, he read English for an MPhil degree in Legon, specializing in the Syntax of International Auxiliary Languages. Grandpa, an expert on Ghanaian Pidgin English, has lived in almost all regions of Ghana ever. Willy Tuadzra is the CEO of Grandpa & Sons Primal Communications Consult. He was born in the 1970s.

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